Do you have a Will drawn up? A legal document outlining how you want your earthly possessions to be shared and split among the people you love (or don't love)? Is it current? Or does it have your ex listed as the sole beneficiary despite you now being remarried with four kids?
The reason I ask is that my dad died suddenly and very unexpectedly last year and, while his Will is current (having been re-done when he remarried in 2009), it is in the process of being contested (not by me).
This upsets me a lot. A whole lot of reasons abound but first and foremost I see that dad's Will outlines his wishes to ensure his widow is supported and looked after following his death. I respect that and totally agree. Of course, having two previous wives with children (who may or may not believe they are entitled to a cut) adds a whole new
potentially (nothing potential about it - it's real) combustive element to the mix, but dad's Will outlines his wishes and I respect that. I have a strong support for the strength of a Will in our legal system, particularly a Will made by a person who was fit and healthy and focused on his new future and who had no reason to think his Will would ever be needed anytime in the near future. I also like to believe that my Will will be upheld as I am upholding his.
I also firmly believe that should the claim against his estate be successful, karma will be enacted. And Karma can be a mean bitch whose bad side I don't want to get on.
Likewise you don't get to cross my dad and get away with it - you couldn't do it when he was alive and I doubt you'd be able to get away with it now.
Good luck to you if you think you can.
So, if you haven't done it already, ring your solicitor now and get your Will drawn up. If you have a Will, make sure it is current - update it if you need to. But most importantly, don't wait - you may not get a second chance.