Saturday, March 9, 2013

Marching on....

So it's been a while.

Time has a tendency to disappear on me these days.  Half the time I don't know if I'm coming or going.  I mean, we're in March already, for Pete's sake! (who is Pete, btw?).

I've been feeling a little out-of-sorts lately.  Not right.  Not me.  

I don't know what my problem is, really.  I mean, this year is shaping up to be the best year in quite a few.  I should be so very happy for the promise of the future that is but just a few weeks (days?) away.  But for some reason I'm all teary and anxious. I can't see the forest for the trees.    I'm blinded by the past, fearful of the future.  You know, that sort of thing.

I'm hoping it's just a result of my usual knee-jerk reaction to change.  Flight I am.  No fight in me.  Uncontrollable on my part initially but eventually I reign it in.  But this one feels like something more.  Something deep down that hasn't been addressed......

My sleep is interrupted.  I'm having trouble being on my own longer than an hour or two.  I wish I would stop eating the world (good thing I haven't been shopping in a while and there is no crap on the shelves otherwise I would be inhaling it).  I keep crying.  I don't want to go to work.  

I don't know.  

I just wish I could stop the crying for no reason.  I don't have the disposition for it.

I see the doctor on Monday.

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